A prayer of thanksgiving to God

(by Pastor Rick Warren)

A Prayer of Thanksgiving to God

"Because of Jesus, I now can live a life of joy, purpose, peace, and love."

God, I have so much joy right now, knowing that you decided to send Jesus to earth so I could be saved from a life of hopelessness and sin and be a peacemaker for you. I recognize in this moment that you saved my life when you sent Jesus, and that because of Jesus, I now can live a life of joy, purpose, peace, and love. I hold onto that hope today. When I look at the world around me, I see so many people who are struggling with stressful, meaningless, chaotic lives without loving, caring relationships. That was my life before you saved me. To say I am grateful doesn't begin to express what I am feeling. I just know I have a sense of meaning and peace I have never had before and could never get on my own strength - and I am full of amazing happiness.
I feel like celebrating right now, knowing that I am now on your side, instead of being at war with you. I know that with you I will never again be lost and alone. I am a new person today, and I recognize what I have just been given. I pray that, as I continue to grow spiritually every day, I will come to understand everything you have just accomplished in my life. By faith, I know I can trust you to be in my life today - and every day. I know I can count on you when things get tough, and knowing I will spend eternity in your presence gives me such hope!

Thank you, Jesus, for the peace you have given me. I pray you will use me as an instrument of that peace so I can help my family, friends, and the world in which I live. I feel so different right now, knowing that you and I are now OK, knowing I am on the road to a deeper understanding of what it means to live for an audience of one. I ask you to help me pray when I become upset so that I will have your peace in any situation I face - good or bad. Help me to get ready to help other people as others have already helped me. I want to make a difference in this world, and I want to help everyone I meet have the same hope I now have. I can't do this alone, so I ask you to make me a peacemaker.

Thank you for loving me. Thank you for saving me. And thank you for giving me a peace I have never known before. May everything I do, from this day on, reflect these same qualities as I tell others what you just did for me. I am full of anticipation at the kind of life I can now live.
I love you, Jesus!

Note:
It's not easy to have peace all the time. Most times, we feel angry, frustrated, injustice, wronged, hurt, tired, unfairly treated, misunderstood or sick. So this prayer comes at a right time to me.

This Christmas, a fellow small group member's elderly mom was baptised. She had been diagnosed with cancer at the liver (we found out when we're at the airport in Singapore, returning back to Miri on the same flight, in Oct). The doctors were not sure where it started from. With a poor prognosis, she wanted to seek the truth and peace. Our Pastor Law prayed for her, fellow small group members prayed, and the church prayed. She accepted Christ. Then our small group leader Sally taught her from the bible. Even the old learn new things.

God is at work around us, He seeks us.

Assistant Pastor Connie shared in her Christmas sermon yesterday that her Father in law died in an accident while at work in South Africa. He had been there for only six months out of a year's work stint. Her husband and her had been praying for the father. Before he left for South Africa, they gave him a bible. He said he will try to read it.

When he died, they were devastated. They also wonder if he had been saved. They couldn't bear to think that he was not. They received news from an aunty in Australia. She called to say that the father had called her and when she asked him to repeat the sinner's prayer after her, he did so. She also encouraged him to be baptised. He said he will do so next year when he returns back from South Africa and wanted to be baptised with his grandchild...Pastor Connie is due to deliver a baby girl in May.

I know many tears rolled yesterday morning. Tinge of sadness and yet with an indescribable joy.

Christmas is indeed joyous.

A Blessed Christmas to everyone (warning: long post)

Firstly, a Blessed Christmas to everyone. I have been busy with almost two weeks in Singapore to accompany Simon for his operation to remove a tumour at the parotid area. Then I was back in Miri for about 9 days. But have been busy and sleepy, so I didn't update my blog, and only photos in my Facebook account. And no time to reflect yet.

Secondly, thanksgiving for it wasn't a tumour that Simon removed but a lump of lymph nodes. Well, we would only know for sure only after the growth is removed and sent for biopsy. And why was it there in the first place is because of toxoplasma.

Singapore trip for Simon's surgery
A long recap of our time in Singapore. Simon went earlier on 7 Dec to do pre-operation check up (whether he was fit to go under the knife). No wonder they say that not everyone who needs surgery can do it.

After a quick check up with Dr CT Chew on 9 Dec, we went to do admissions procedure at Mount Elisabeth Hospital. We were about third in queue and waited very shortly before being attended. After being asked for all our particulars and filling in the nec forms (esp for insurance), a nice staff almost like a concierge came to us and bring us via a private lift to the ward. They say that we will get to the ward within 5mins, 30mins at max. OK, this is way faster than my mom who went to govt hospitals (a couple times for falls and her last case of TB) which could take a couple of hours coz non-emergency.

One thing I observed was that the nurse at Mount Elisabeth who asked Simon a whole load of questions upon checking in (wow, it's like checking-in a hotel and doing the check-in in your hotel room), sounded a little surprised that Simon had not been been in hospital for any kind of operation. Perhaps in this day and age, many have undergone some operation or another? But super top notch service at Mount Elisabeth Hospital..of course at super top notch prices also lah. Praise God that we decided to top up our medical insurance to cover to 100% otherwise, there would have been a hole in our pockets. And then Simon had to select his menu for dinner and lunch the next day (and also lunch in case he needs to be warded for longer, talk about advance planning). While Simon went for surgery, I met my old college and very good friend Royati for lunch. And her German beau who was in town.

Also met up with Trish who was collecting some things from me coz she was going off on a hol. Super efficient Trish even managed to shop gifts for my kidlets. Caught up with her at Cova at Paragon, which had the freshest cakes and desserts a la Italian style.

I was silly to tell Simon to call me after his op. I mean, the guy was under general anesthetic, he would be groggy for a few hours after surgery!! OK, I am totally ignorant about hospitals, surgeries, etc. So by the time I went back, Simon had been back in his room for a while, but sound asleep. He woke up and I gave him some water, then he slept again till dinner time.

"Si buay buay song!"...very uncomfortable

He was quite good in his recovery coz he finished his dinner (slowly lah). Some people would even throw up coz of GA (yes I know coz friends told me so). After he went to bed, I went back to Cold Storage at Paragon to get a simple sashimi bento and Hersheys semi-sweet mini choc chips for a friend back in Miri). I tell you, I had my fill of Japanese food (coz three out of my first four meals were all Japanese, and mainly sashimi!)

Went back to the hospital the next day at around 8.15am and Simon already had his breakkie at 6am. After the nurse removed the tube, Simon felt much better. We waited for doc to give the all clear for discharge. Then my good friend Chwee Wei came by for breakfast, more for me, with you tiao and soya beancurd from Tiong Bahru market and even chui kueh. I asked the parents of the young chap at the next bed who had just checked in for surgery, to join us. The mom said we were having a feast, while the dad said we're most probably celebrating Simon's discharge. I tell you the breakfast wasn't much...it's the strong smell from the chai por on the chui kueh!

After Simon was discharged, we went back to see Dr Chew at his clinic. Simon still had some discomfort and doc checked hie ear with his scope. Turned out there was some blood clot at the operated area. After gentle dislodging and some suction, the ear was cleared and Simon felt much better, like his ear popped in a pressurised plane.

We got back to the inn where Simon slept. I then quickly went to Centrepoint (where we had passed by earlier and saw the Gap signage) to get some jeans (I have been wearing baggy jeans for so long and feeling frumpy), and some lunch from the noodle shop there. I tell you, four pairs of jeans were very heavy and so I didn't shop much. Managed to get a Calendar, bumper stickers and some cards from two lovely ladies at the SPCA counter outside Cold Storage, and even two handbag clips from Robinsons for Christmas pressies.

Went back and Simon was awake already. He woke up and felt hungry and ate some fruits already. I bought rice and char siew. MIL said as he was on anti-biotics, he had better eat some rice to fill him up. After the late lunch, it was nap time till dinner. Never felt so tired before, and I didn't have to run after kids.

And the reason was....all the walking! No one walks in Miri! It's always drive from point A to point B. After discharged, we went to Paragon to pay part of the bill at Citibank (very convenient location, Mount E). After Simon went back to the inn at Lloyd Road, I walked to Centrepoint, shopped and then carried 4 jeans plus lunch all the way back to Lloyd Road.

On Sat (11 Dec), we had the car from a friend, who was away on hol, and took a drive to Old Airport Road to have breakfast. Then visited Simon's godma around that area. Then we went back to check out to go to our new flat at Bradell. The whole afternoon till evening, we're there coz workers came to paint the living room, the dining table and chairs and mattress were delivered, and the washing machine, fridge and TV. Most of these were bought by Simon's agent friend while we're in Miri while a couple were bought the day I arrived.

For the next few days, we lived, ate and shopped at Bradell and Toa Payoh, fixing up the flat for our tenants (air-conditioners for the bedrooms and ceiling fan for the living room were fixed on Mon and coocker hood on Wed). and Simon had to take his naps. We found out the hard way when we were out the whole of Sunday, at church, lunch at Wisma, bought my Christmas pressie of Canon camera Ixus 210 and a Canon Selphy printer, then house blessing at Sock and Guan's place. Simon was all knackered out!

I missed my kidlets during those nine days away from there. No smiles and koala-like clings from Jillian, and no "What is that?" and hugs and kisses from Jon (not sure about other boys, but this one kisses only his mommy and not daddy). About 90% of the time when I called during the day, Jon and Jill were usually taking their naps, and MIL was most pleased that they were obedient and took naps without a fuss coz that meant she could do her stuff! And speaking to jon was quite weird...he sounded so different! Sigh, still baby talking...and even "I want to or or (sleep) liao." after like 10 super fast seconds of babbling. For Jill, MIL said she would hold the phone receiver and lept looking around coz she could hear me but not see me. Must have been a funny sight.

We missed an important milestone in Jill's development - walking!!! She could walk for all of 3 steps before we went away. Then while we're away, she walked!

A few more snapshots.

Dinner with my old friends at Buono (by then I have put on weight, even on my face too, after having 3 full meals a day)

Chanel boutique at Marina Bay Sands Shoppes. Others are attracted to the handbags and clothes, I was attracted to the paper Christmas tree made up of doilies.

With mom, who's half the woman I am, physically.

Quick meet up with Medrey!

Back in Miri

Came back on 16 Dec and I unpacked to do some washing while Simon had a quick bite before going upstairs. He thought the kids were sleeping with grandma. So Jon woke up, came down and gave me a big hug while I gave him a big kiss. He loved it when I gave him a couple of small dinosaurs I bought at 7-Eleven. He was so excited watching me unpack, I had to stop.

Grandma had shared while we're in SG that the reason Jon got allt hose scrapes and scratches was because our big boy didn't want to share. He would take a toy and refused to let other have a turn at it. Worse, he would take a toy from someone who was already playing with it. And the boys would of course demand for it back and when he refused, they would snatch it back! Aiyo, Jon ah Jon!

But we had decided that he would continue going ot that childcare centre (very big place, but only 8 kids max, coz it's runned by the principal and one maid). I had heard good thing about the place, but now that my son is like that....hmm. I missed his nursery where there were more teachers and there was orderliness. They also had a good mix of kids whereas at the childcare, there were 6-7 boys and two girls...so super loud and rough play. But Jon has to learn sooner or later in the real world. and it's for half days. We have to teach him at home to respect others, to share and not push his Jill or his cousin whenever they take his things. Long journey ahead.

Christmas

Te kids were thrilled to see the Christmas tree finally up (yes, we were tired after the Singapore trip). They are really blessed to grow and play with each other. Megan (not in pic) is oldest at 4yrs, followed by Jon (3yrs), Mabel (2yrs), Jillian (16months) and Qiqi (14months).

Christmas wish came through - Jill's walking, and non-stop too!

We had a pot bless at Jennifer's and Ngu's home on 23 Dec. Four couples plus Jon, Cavan (2yrs), Arissa (19months) and baby Emmeline (5months).Dinner was sumptous with a spread of roast chicken, pasta, sausages (black pepper, cheese n mushroom), corn, salad, lamb stew, mash potato, steamed veg. not including desserts of tang yuan, ice cream and fruits.

Then children carollers from our church came by to sing for us. Cavan's sister, Chloe, was one of them. Our party was the last stop, and it was wonderful indeed to have 22kids (plus another 3 teens to help with music accompanyment). Jon, who was running around and screaming with Cavan, sat down quietly throughout and listened to the carollers. He did so without me by his side, coz I was taking photos. Yes, he does have this quiet side of him when he's concentrating on something, haha!

On Christmas morning, we're having a morning service at a hotel to accommodate the congregation and our families, and invited guests. It'll also be a farewell lunch for our pastor, who's back to his studies. We've invited Simon's parents, and his bro Stanley and wife Grace. Then it'll be home for the kids to nap, open some presents and dinner at a small cafe called Annie's kitchen. Can't wait coz she cooks some nice western dishes.

If you have made it all the way to the end, tenkews for your patience. If you had just scrolled and scanned through the photos, also tenkews! Just want to wish you and your family a Blessed Christmas. Christmas is special and joyful to us coz our God, who gives good gifts (James 1:17), gave his most precious gift, His Son, Jesus. That's why we also give gifts to our loved ones.

Will be MIA for a while

I will fly off tomorrow morning to Singapore to accompany Simon for his operation to remove a tumour at the parotid area. The surgery is scheduled on Thu, 9 Dec at 2pm. So appreciate your prayers for a smooth surgery under the good hands of Dr CT Chew at Mount Elizabeth. Then we will stay on for a week to remove the stitches and get the final report before flying home.

The kidlets will be at home under the care of grandma. Would love to bring them to Singapore, esp Jonathan, who may love to see the Dinosaurs show. But I would need to be with Simon on day of surgery as well as take care of him after that. So, they're not coming.

I started to put Jon at a day care last Sat. This would help grandma as she will have the morning to do her chores and cook the kidlets' porridge (Jill) and soup (Jon). But when he came home that on Sat, he actually said, "da si ni (beat you till you die)!" Then on Mon, he came back with scrapes on his hands. The child care has mostly boys, about 6 of them and they play quite roughly.

I asked Jon if he likes the school, and he replied, "No." If he likes the boys, "no". If he likes the teacher, and so on...you get the pic. Not even the big slides and many there could entice him to go there again! And he even asked for his nursery school teacher. So how?

After discussing with my mom-in-law, we decided she will try to bring him to the childcare centre tom (I will be at the airport by then) and see his reaction. If he really insists on not going, then she will not force him. She said he could have felt threatened by the boys there. If he goes, she will monitor his behavior and reaction. Why?

Coz over the last two days, his behaviour has changed drastically. He's become very aggressive, to the extent of pushing Jillian. Previously, when he doesn't want Jill or Mabel to touch his toys, he will just take the toys away, or even walk away. or even ask to be put in the play pen with the girls outside. This time, his actions are more aggressive. He even showed some kongfu stances! He's also become very loud, and kept shouting. Today, kakak even hit his hand coz he hit Jill on her head. It must have been quite hard otherwise kakak would not have laid a finger on Jon. Of course, kakak apologised profusely when I asked how come Jon was crying.

I am more used to seeing Jon in a nice environment where he plays (and behaves) nicely with other kids

Just last week, whenever he want something, he will use his sweetest voice, more manja than before, and ask me to give it to him. Now, he just shouted for the thing or demand for it. And I have seen this behaviour from the boys at the childcare....yes, from my three visits there.

I think grandma would rather put up with his naughty and previously-loud (super loud these two days) behaviour at home, than to put him to this new environment where he will learn from others.

I just pray that I will get my cheeky boy back. After saying a prayer and giving Jon his milk before he slept, I told Jon I love him by pointing at my nose then his nose. He said, "I love you." and also touched his nose before mine.

My little sweetie in the cry room at church

I will surely miss Jon and Jill when I am in Singapore. This will be the longest that I've been away from them.

What's in a number

A couple of friends had commented that Jon and Jill were sick very often. I totally agreed with them. Apart from catching whatever germs from nursery, Jon is a heaty boy and can get coughs and fevers (esp when he eats biscuits, he had better drink liquids, otherwise...). He also catches chills easily after playing and perspiring buckets (must wipe down before entering air-conditioned living room).

Two other important factors: four of us staying in one bedroom, and the home being air-conditioned - it's a likely scenario for germs to spread to the kids if any of us is sick, right?
The official count: Jonathan has been to the paediatrician 15 times this year and Jill 8 times (not counting immunisation). That's way too many times!!!


If I minus the 3 visits Jon went for Hand, Foot, Mouth disease, it still works out to be an average of 1 visit a month! Before he went to nursery, Jon visited the doc less than 5 times in his first 1.5years! The bugs having a merry time with my kidlets! To comfort myself, I say most of the visits were repeated during the same bout of illness coz when his fever didn't subside after three days, we had return to get anti biotics for our big boy.

So, after minusing two visit for Jill for HFMD, that meant that she saw doc 6 times for other illnesses over 15months. That's not too bad, right?

Here're a couple of photos of Jillian looking chirpier. She's back to her smiley self and calling "papa" in her I-saw-you-please-come-carry-me voice.

She loves her books...

...and when she sees a pic she likes, she kisses it!This little girl can eat two Gardenia buns in a row!

I pray that 2011 will be a healthier year for my family!

PS: I've managed to scrap smaller LOs of Jill for a small album. Will take photos and post soon.

PPS: We will be in Singapore next week for a day operation to remove Simon's 2-cm tumour at the parotid area. I was worried that the kids may fall sick while we're away. Now that they were sick even before we went, and I have nursed them back to health, that means that I've done my motherly duty, right? We will not be bringing the kids, coz I have to take care of Simon esp after the operation and waiting for a week before removing stitches. We're both so looking forward to resting, catching up on sleep, and FOOD. And perhaps a couple of movies....

Finally, an LO after a 2month hiatus

OK, finally did an LO after two months plus of not scrapping. Dug around for old photos that I had printed. This was taken when Jon was at the Singapore zoo when he was 16months.

It didn't look like that initially, I tore the first LO up...no mojo and I tried to incorporate too many things. 2nd time around, I went simple.
I asked myself what I would like to do: doodle and sew. And so I did. Smiled as I doodled water droplets and stuck blue buttons on them. Also cut out a few circles of felt and sewed buttons on. Simple and therapeutic...I do wish I have some blue mist to spray on the white parts.

And hubs was nice to buy me some photo paper...printed some photos, but my HP photosmart didn't work. Hubs checked and said I hadn't been printing for some time, and fixed it. Very happy to have married a handy man. Hope to scrap one more LO next week. Very tired. The sore throat and phlegm is trying to creep in and I am trying to beat it with cough syrup and lozenges.

Advice needed

I have not been scrapping LOs, coz I ran out of photo paper....and that's like two months ago. Must get off my butt to get photo paper. I should also get photo paper for my usual HP printer so I can print diff sizes of photos to scrap. Any recommendation on what paper to get?

I am contemplating getting the Canon Selphy. Coz the photos printed by my little HP photosmart sometimes smudges. The Canon Selphy has a durable overcoating that protects photos from water overspill, fingerprints and other hazards. The CP780 comes in silver or red although the screen shot is more pink than red. What do you think?

The LCD display of my camera has gone kaputs for a few months already. I didn't replace the camera coz it can still take photos. Just that I am not sure if they're clear, haha! ANy recommentdations on a slim PHD (press-here-dummy) camera? I won't buy a SLR coz I have so many things in my bag already for two kidlets!

Lastly, check out this SB room of Jennifer Johner!!!! She calls it her craft space. Space is such a luxury! Love it, esp the pom pom balls hanging on top. I know they collect dust, but they add such a beautiful touch to the room! And so many crafters have the Ikea Expedit bookshelf...there's no Ikea in Miri. Unless I get other things, it is not worth it to ship just one over hor. Maybe I should just buy Expedit bookshelves for the whole house. Or we could just ask a carpenter to copy lor....

Tests, meds and more tests

Test #1

Two thursdays ago (4 Nov) First, Simon noticed a small lump at his right parotid area, the area where the ear joins the face. It's a small but hard lump and he asked if there was an insect bite. Nope, there wasn't. We advised him to go to the doc the next day to check it out.

Turned out to be a tumor. After a CT scan and a fine needle biopsy, it turned out to be benign. But as there are five major nerves at the area, we decided it's best to remove it. What if the nerves grow around it in future. what it the tumour grows slowly over the years and cause complications later on...what ifs.

Made some calls, made some decisions, we're going back to Singapore in Dec to remove it. Firstly, Simon was going back to get the keys to our Bradell flat, make sure the place is nice and clean with new appliances for our new tenants (that's the responsible man for my husband). Secondly, it's covered by insurance. Thankfully, the planner husband decided we both should top up our Medishield insurance to get total coverage, otherwise it would cost about $S13,000 to remove a small 2-cm tumour and medishield will cover only about S$3k, leaving us to fork out S$10K! Or we could do the polyclinic way and wait.

Meds...for the kids

Then the kids fell sick....again. This time, it's my fault. Jon had a bit of cough and last Sat, we went out with a friend for a drive, stumbled upon the first MacDonald's drive-through in Miri, and decided to have lunch there. Jon played and had so much fun at the simple playground and woke up a sweat. Then he had some fries.

We went back, and took a nap. When he woke up, there was a yellow discharge at this left eye. Then on Sun, his touch, feely fingers meant the right eye got it too. And he developed a fever (must have caught a chill on Sat at Macs). Went to see doc on Mon. Doc said there was mucus at his sinus cavity, and as the nasal passage was blocked, it went upwards and out near the tear glands. Whoa, I thought mucus was only smart enough to come out as phlegm...but as discharge at the eye....man!

I had a cough and had promptly passed the germs to Jillian. Grandma said she noticed Jillian was breathing harder since Thu. I obviously didn't. So she was breathing so nosily on Sat night. and we decided she should go see doc too on Mon. Thank goodness the few dosage of meds was enough and she could carry on with them and didn't need to go under the nebuliser.

More tests

Dear hubs went for a dinner last Thu night and came back with the runs. He didn't tell me he had the runs since morning after the oily char kway teow, and mind you, it's not was oily as the ones we have in Singapore. If I knew, I would have reminded him not to eat too much that night. Well, he had suckling pig and what-nots.

So yesterday, when after Jon had fever for three nights and had to go back to get anti-biotics, Simon decided to see the doc. He has this issue of having the runs whenever he's stressed or what he eats foods that are too oily or rich. He thought it could be Irritable Bowel Syndrome. MIL thought it could be a gastric issue. So we decided he should do both a colonscopy as well as Endoscopy.

MIL was concerned and was afraid he could discover polyps. Polyps are common in adults and are harmless. However, most colorectal cancer begins as a polyp, so removing polyps early is an effective way to prevent cancer.

Praise God, nothing down there. Turns out that he has excessive stomach acids. Got some meds, and waiting for results 10days after.